Rocky Road of Love...in Heels by Liam Livings
Author:Liam Livings [Livings, Liam]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: NineStar Press, LGBT, contemporary, cross dressing, drag queen, family drama, coming-of-age, gay, romante, 1990s
Publisher: NineStar Press, LLC
Published: 2018-10-15T00:00:00+00:00
Chapter Twenty-Three
LATE AUGUST 1999
I went to Brighton Pride with Kieran and Jo. I was so pleased to see Kieran back safely from Oz. It was only as I hugged him tight in my Madonna black lacy outfit Mum had helped me pick for the day, I realised how much Iâd missed him, through all the ups and downs Iâd had since heâd gone. The outfit was aiming to be Madonna in the True Blue era, which was really how I felt inside when I sat and let myself think about it. The veil and gloves were deliciously lacy and also conveniently covered up bruises and marks I had all over my body.
Aaron didnât come with me as I didnât tell him about it. Naughty, I know, but I couldnât face having to tell anyone about him, so it was simpler if he didnât come. Tony didnât question it as he wasnât stupid. He knew Iâd been having some issues with Aaron, because Iâd refused to talk about the relationship. But Iâd not been able to tell even him the full story, as I wasnât really sure it wasnât me being oversensitive and making a mountain out of a molehill. It was also a nice break from the two versions of Aaron I was having to juggle.
Tony and I spent most of the festival in the cabaret tent, me picking up tips from acts far better and more experienced than me and Tony drinking, laughing and enjoying the cabaret and occasionally taking the piss out of me for making notes at a Pride event.
It was good for me to have something, other than Aaron, to concentrate on. Because when I let my mind drift and not think about work, or Mum, or performing, I had gnawing doubts and thoughts about Aaron coming out from my mind to chew at me: is he the best youâll ever get? Will no other men put up with my cross-dressing? Do I antagonise him and so deserve what I get? Is what Iâm getting really that bad when I really sit down and think about it?
These and hundreds of other thoughts filled my head when I sat with nothing else to fill it; so I tried hard to fill it most of the time.
All in all, Brighton Pride was a wonderfully drag filled distraction from everything really.
Kieranâs dad, Mr. Donovan, fixed my car. Heâd mentioned it again after the last time heâd helped me and said how much heâd enjoyed it refusing to take any money, as it was a hobby for him, like baking or gardening is for others. Even though I felt a bit awkward, I took Mr. Donovan up on his offer.
I went to Kieranâs house and while his dad peered and poked around under the bonnet, wiping an oily rag and removing caps and unscrewing holes, topping them up with oil, water, and some blue stuff too, I spent a wonderful afternoon with Kieran, asking him what heâd thought of Brighton Pride, and was he glad to be back from Oz.
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